Give Yourself Permission
Speaker 0: Thanks for listening to Takeout Therapy. A podcast for people who are trying to be their themselves, but maybe need a little more information about it all. I'm Rebecca Hunter, a therapist and anxiety specialist dolling out the information. Latest research, and of course, a little advice here and there. If you've got less than twenty minutes and a good sense of humor, you will find this discussion helpful.
This isn't therapy. It's self help at its finest. Let's get to work. Hello, friend. I'm so glad you're here with me today.
We're going to have a good conversation. You know, so often when people come in to see me, one of the biggest problems they're experiencing is that they're really uncomfortable with other people's discomfort. And so they try really hard not to make other people uncomfortable or angry or sad. Do you know what I mean? We're all trying to be authentic and to listen to ourselves and all that crap.
But it is kinda hard when other people don't like our truth. You know? It's hard when we actually have an opinion that people don't like or we wanna try something that people might look sideways at. But we can't keep arranging our lives around what other people are comfortable with. It's just not gonna work.
Right? It stopped working for me a long time ago friend. Listen. My goal for today's podcast is to lift us both into our power. To help us remember that we are sovereign beings and sometimes it helps to remind ourselves that we have a lot of choices about how we operate in this life.
Today, I'm gonna give us both permission to choose. Just to choose. In a few specific ways. Earlier this week, I found myself on social media doing a little rant or pet talk, whatever, you know. It's a little video on Instagram or Facebook or whatever, and you can watch it if you want to.
I was just really trying to empower people to practice some self love right now. My point is just that taking care of ourselves, it's not self centered. I wanna just encourage people to figure out what it is they need right now. In this extremely trying time, and, like, go with that. Do that.
Ask for that. So as I start this conversation, yeah, it occurs to me that when we're trying so hard not to piss each other off all the time, it's really difficult to take care of ourselves. You know, when we're when we're kinda walking on egg shells in our lives to make sure that the other people are doing okay. It's just really hard. Right?
So today, I give you permission. I give you permission to be your authentic self to figure out what it is you need and ask for that, to listen to your true longings in this life and act on them. You know? I give you permission to figure out how it is that you need to live and do that. I give you permission to act like you every day in every location with whoever is lucky enough to be in your presence.
If your authentic self likes wearing unmatched clothing. Cool. Do that. If your authentic self likes to dance in your kitchen, Great. Do that.
Don't worry about what people think of you or whether they're gonna like you or not. I give you permission to leave that behind. Be your authentic self. Need help with this? Start journaling.
This is what I always say. Right? Get a journal. You'll find yourself real quick. Don't try to fix you or change you too much.
Just be you for a little while and just see how it goes. I give you permission to say no to literally anything that does not suit you. My friend, do you have values? Right? Like, you won't say no to feeding your dog, but you might say no to that party you don't feel like going to or to hanging out with that friend that freaks you out right now.
Say no to putting yourself in situations that are uncomfortable or dealing with people's crappy behavior or listening to another lecture from someone who does not share your values. Just say no. I give you permission. I give you permission to say yes to the party or to the silence. To your whim, my friend.
Just go ahead and try it out. Will you say yes? It's good for you. If you wanna do it, that's a yes. We have to stop ignoring the things we need or want to make other people comfortable.
We can say yes yes to the new experience because you know it's good for you yes to staying healthy. Whatever that means for you, yes to every single emotion you have. Yes to being brave every single day. I give you permission to say yes. I give you permission to put yourself first, my friend, you see, this is where we really get into trouble.
Don't you think? We give ourselves up to make other people happy or comfortable or to avoid a conflict or discomfort Yeah. When you put yourself first, none of that actually matters. What matters is what is good and healthy and how full for you, for your physical and mental health. Sometimes that's all that matters.
Frankly, when you start putting yourself first, you'll learn about yourself, and then you'll be able to help others know you deeply. Know what you need. That's kinda how it all works. How can I tell you, how to care for me, when I have trouble doing that for myself? Yeah.
So my friend, right now when things are Oh, so freaking hard. I give you permission to put yourself first. Say yes. Say no. Say your authentic truth.
You need some time alone? Arrange that if you can. You need to take a day off work to rest? Great. Lay around and watch TV, take a bath, drink a glass of seltzer on the front porch for crying out loud.
But when people need you, or want to tell you something important or want you to come to the party, I give you permission to just put yourself first. Check-in with yourself before every move you make and just see how you're doing. And if you need to rearrange your priorities, yeah, I give you permission to put yourself first. Here's the deal. We've gotta take care of ourselves right now.
Always. Not just right now, always, but like right now. And I care about the other people. You know I do, and I know you do too. But first, I've gotta care about me.
That's what makes this whole shebang work. Okay. So I'm off to the woods this weekend. I'm gonna go up to one of my favorite spots up on Mount Hood. And I have some fun things coming up for you soon.
I'm feeling the weekly rotation again. I'm out of my kind of summer break period. So let's talk about some interesting stuff, shall we? I'm gonna tell you my anxiety story in a couple weeks. So I'm gonna do that because I just feel like I'm always trying to demonstrate healing and to give people hope for change.
And my story to me just exemplifies that. And then, yeah, we're gonna talk about the never ending hustle because that's a burnout machine. You know what I mean? So not good for us, and that's gonna be a really helpful discussion for you and for me. Right?
And at the end of the month, I'm gonna do a week long video series for all you stressed out overwhelmed friends out there. Raise your hand. I'm here to help you. And I can teach you some ways to get your sanity back You know, this has been a long run. And if you're feeling totally underwhelmed, you're not alone.
Join me for the last week of the month. I'm calling it stress relief week. This year. I have some good stuff planned. I'm excited.
You can register on my website very soon. As soon as I get my act together, Watch my social media for that though. So I've been on there talking you through this thing, baby, on social media. I'm trying to show up and help people out, and it's always really nice to hear from you. So until next week, say yes.
Say no. Just show up and be willing. I will be right here with you doing the work. Okay. I hope you found today's episode helpful.
Here's the deal. I'd like to get rid of some of this stigma around mental health, and this is how I'm doing it. You can join me by leaving a review sending an episode along to a struggling friend or even subscribing. Any of those choices would be so exciting my friend because then you and I we would be helping more people. Let's do that.
If you wanna work with me, visit me at rebekah hunter m s w dot com, and you can see all the fun things I'm up to. Don't forget, I'm an anxiety specialist. So if that's your jam, it's my jam too. Way to show up today.
